Julia, I so wish you were here. We still have no answers or proof that Ray was the body in the cabin. I just don't know what to do how to act where to put what feeling were. I hurt so bad Julia. He is just a boy well a young man but still just a boy. I tried to tell him shoe him teach him he could do different with his life. I failed someplace. I cant believe this pain. I just cant fix this, I hurt Julia I just fucking hurt. I don't know what to do. It is so hard to see Yvonne, again I just can not fix it. I'm lost.